Have you ever suffered with postpartum depression?
I have. With both babies.
The first time, I knew exactly what it was. The usual: don't want to do anything except cry, feel melancholy, etc and showed up when DD was around 2 weeks old.
This time, not so much. This time didn't show up until my DD turned about 3 months old. It started out as me doing irrational things, like yelling and swearing at her because I thought she should've eaten more. Ridiculous. From there, it just got worse. Major high and low mood swings, anxiety attacks surrounding everyday tasks, social anxiety/withdrawal, lots of yelling, lots of crying, inability to remember anything, starting to type/write like I'm dyslexic, nightmares, intense irritability and anger, overwhelming fatigue (despite getting 9+ hours of sleep at night), feelings of inadequacy as a wife and mother, etc.
I knew I needed help, once my beloved Homemakers small group ladies lovingly pointed out what they thought it was (postpartum depression). Not having peace about going on an anti-depressant, I sought out the help of my holistic Dr.
I'm currently taking a progesterone cream (which also is said to help PCOS and Endometriosis), 5-HTP and a flower essence (Iris and Tiger Lily). As always, these are remedies for my specific body. Please consult with your Dr before starting any new supplement.
Yesterday I went in for what the clinic calls an, "EmoBalance". You put on this glove that measures the Bio Energy of your emotions. Here's what the website says about it: Spectra Vision, Bio Energy Balancer.
Anyway, my scan came back and the negative emotions that came back were no surprise: melancholy, anger, anxiety, etc. Everything I've been battling with the postpartum depression.
The remedy? A flower essence supplement with the flowers to help combat my specific issues.
Here are mine:
Positive Qualities: inspired artistry deep soulfulness which is in touch with higher realms
Patterns of Imbalance: lack inspiration: feeling weighed down by the ordinariness of the world
Cross-references: eating disorders, frustration, home and lifestyle, inadequacy, mother and mothering, spiritual opening
As the physical body needs air to breathe so the soul needs inspiration in order to live. Many modern individuals lack soul vitality: a gray pallor stifles them. They suffocate in the mundane and mechanical. Iris is a fundamental remedy for restoring and revitalizing the soul. It is not only for those who are on a specific artistic path, but also for those individuals who need to bring passionate creativity to their life work. Iris essence impels the soul to create and cultivate beauty within itself and within the world.
How It Applies to Me: I'm a Stay-at-home-Mommy who could definitely use some inspiration in my life work!
Positive Qualities: inner peace and harmony as a foundation for outer relationships
Patterns of Imbalance: overly aggressive, hostile attitude
Cross-references: aggressiveness, community life and group experience, hostility, leadership, lower self, personal relationships
The positive healing of ourselves and the larger world depends very much on the ability to shift from competitive, aggressive models of behavior to those which are cooperative and inclusive. Tiger Lily is an extremely beneficial remedy for helping the soul to transmute overly hostile or aggressive tendencies into positive social impulses. It helps the consciousness to move from a limited personal perspective towards values that include the greater whole. This essence especially benefits those who see themselves as separate from others, or as striving against others rather than working for the common good.
How It Applies to Me: I've been battling social anxiety and withdrawal. I also lead a Homemakers group at my church once a week. This past year has also been a year of cutting out some unhealthy friendships from my life.
Positive Qualities: experiencing and absorbing the fullness of life, especially the sensory aspects
Patterns of Imbalance: overwhelm due to overstimulation, hypersensitivity to environment or to outer activity, sensory congestion
Cross-references: clarity, eating disorders, irritability, moderation, overwhelm, relaxation, restlessness, stress
Modern living conditions can stun and even stifle the sensory capacities of most persons. With the advent of the technological age, the soul is literally bombarded with countless sense impressions - what one sees, hears, tastes, smells and touches in the course of a day can be quite staggering. In prior times, those who wished to develop spiritually sought remote environments which diminished sensorial stimulation and freed the soul for higher spiritual work. Dill flower essence helps to harmonize the psychic life within the context of daily work and modern living. Through the Dill flower, the soul learns not only to discriminate and regulate sense experience, but even more importantly to allow the sense life itself to become a vehicle for enlightenment.
How It Applies to Me: I've felt like I can't keep up with the speed of life lately and get very overwhelmed. And I've had to cut back my technology time. I also make it a point to get some "quiet time" away to spend with God.
Positive Qualities: humanized spirituality, cosmic consciousness warmed with caring for all that is human and earthly
Patterns of Imbalance: profound feeling of alienation
Cross-references: alienation, awkwardness, body, children, earth healing and nature awareness, environment, escapism, life direction, personal relationships, rejection
These souls suffer in a profound way - an affliction which often receives little understanding from family and friends, or even from therapists. Shooting Star helps such individuals come to understand the meaning of love.
How It Applies to Me: I've always felt alone, alienated and like "something is wrong with me". Feelings of rejection are surely felt on a weekly, if not daily, basis for me. I've been known to say lately, "I want to run away."
Positive Qualities: freedom from limiting influences, making healthy transitions in life, courage to follow one's own path and destiny
Patterns of Imbalance: overly influenced beliefs and values of family or community, or by past experiences
Cross-references: adolescence, authority, breakthrough, co-dependence, concentration and focus, desire, eating disorders, escapism, freedom, habit, patterns, immune disturbances, influence, life direction, protection, sensitivity, strength, transition, true to self
The human soul is akin to the plant in its patterns of growth. It grows slowly, almost imperceptibly from day to day, but there are moments when it makes radical, metamorphic changes, moving beyond its current form to something utterly new. Thus the plant transforms from root, to shoot, to leaf, to flower, to fruit, to seed. Walnut flower essence is an important remedy for times of great life transition. It is indicated for those life passages when the Self must be completely and irrevocably transformed in order to continue its evolution. At these moments, the soul must be unwavering in its sense of inner purpose and conviction. If the mind experiences doubt or confusion, the progress of the Self is impeded, if not imperiled. Walnut is particularly helpful for those who may be easily influenced by family ties, community mores, social conventions, strong personalities, or past habits, and who are unable to muster the strength to make a break with the past and with the ideas of others. This remedy can be broadly applied and is valuable for all life transitions including birth, ending or beginning relationships, etc.
How It Applies to Me: I not only just had a baby, but I went from being a Mommy of 1 to a Mommy of 2! I've also been facing a tough choice for my DD-4yr who will be starting K next year: to homeschool or not to homeschool?
Source: Kaminski, Patricia, and Richard Katz. Flower Essence Reperory: A Compreshensive Guide to North American and English Flower Essence for Emotional and Spiriutal Well-Being. California: The Flower Essence Society, 1996.
Interesting stuff, isn't it?!