Saturday, February 2, 2013

Why I'm Grateful for Endometriosis


Yes, you read that title right. I sit here today, recovering from my 4th surgery for endometriosis, grateful. 

I was in this very place, just 2 years ago, but with a very different mindset. I was angry with God. I didn’t understand why He allowed me to endure this disease. I didn’t understand why He wouldn’t take it away. But, now it doesn’t matter.

This disease is straight from the pit of hell. I don’t want you to miss that. This disease is NOT from the God that I serve. I just want to make sure that we’re clear on that. But, my Lord is so amazing, that He can take the worst of circumstances, and turn them into good.

See, having endometriosis has given me so much. Without this disease, I wouldn’t be who I am today. And, I like me. 

I am strong. Because of endometriosis.
I am courageous. Because of endometriosis.
I am a fighter. Because of endometriosis.
I will never take my children for granted. Because of endometriosis.
I will never take my friends, family and husband for granted. Because of endometriosis.
I will always have a heart for those suffering with infertility. Because of endometriosis.
I will never take my physical health for granted again. Because of endometriosis.
I lead a healthy lifestyle. Because of endometriosis.

But, probably the most important thing that endometriosis has given me, is my relationship with God. See, 2 years ago, I was ready to walk away from Him because of this disease. But, He showed up for me, in a very big way. And He has continued to.

His Word says that He is the I AM. That means that He is the great Healer. That He is the great Physician. And I believe Him, with everything inside of me. If He wanted to heal me, He could. And if He chooses not to, He is STILL the great Physician and the great Healer. 

Sharing my story and my endometriosis journey, has led to this blog and to meeting so many amazing women.  And occasionally, I get to hear from one of my readers and how my story, my journey and/or my relationship with God through it all, has touched their life. I will never know the full ripple effect that my willingness to be authentic and raw has had on others. But, every single time I hear from a reader that it impacted them, it makes it all worth it. And I will continue to endure the physical pain with gratitude, as long as it brings glory to Jesus and others closer to knowing the God that I serve. 

Why?

Because that’s what Jesus did for me.

And I am forever grateful.