Recently I went to a prayer cabin in WI. I went by myself and it's literally in the middle of nowhere. An encounter with God is what I sought and that is exactly what I got. From getting lost to having breakfast w/the Lord the next day, it was all orchestrated by the Spirit. There was so much that happened in the less than 24 hours that I was there, that I couldn't possibly write it all to you here and now. So, if a current thing in my life applies to something I learned at the cabin, I will post it. And we'll start with this...
When I went to the prayer cabin, I was in an icky place. I was dealing w/PCOS & infertility, as well as having daily pain. One thing I sought at the cabin was this very subject... my health. "Lord, what do you want me to do with my health?" I very clearly heard a prompting in my head (aka the Holy Spirit) saying, "Focus on the things that you can control, so I can focus on the things you can't." I've been asking God to heal me & that is clearly something I can not control, yet have been focusing on. There was a point during my stay at the cabin that I literally fell to my knees and cried, saying, "I want healing. Total healing, Father. Why are you not giving it to me?" His reply? "You're asking the wrong question."
Later the next day, I was all packed up and ready to go when I again heard a thought in my brain (aka the Holy Spirit) saying to me, "Come have breakfast with me, before you go." So, I grabbed my iced tea & grapes and set out on the porch for a beautiful morning with God. A little history: I've struggled with food my entire life, using it as a drug to numb myself & even went through an eating disorder treatment. So, this was another thing I wanted clarity on... I've tried to follow a food plan & lose weight in my own strength, but I had yet to try it with God's help. So, I asked, "What should I eat? What do you want me to do surrounding food?" I put my pen to my paper and began to journal. Here's what the journal said, "I provided everything to physically nourish you - tea, spices, fruits, vegetables, etc. It's all here, in nature. When man starts messing with stuff and tries to create things he thinks is better, it causes problems. Just like the story of Adam & Eve. The humans were deceived into thinking they knew better than me. Stick with me and my creations and you'll be fine."
Fast-forward a few weeks. I just had exploratory surgery for the pain I was having and for what they were seeing on an ultrasound. I was diagnosed with PCOS and endometriosis almost 2 years ago. I sought out the best surgeon in the states for endometriosis removal, because the average reoccurrence rate in the states for this incurable disease was 1.5 years, yet this surgeons average rate was 12 years. I truly, in my heart, believed I would never have to deal with endometriosis again (or at least not for another 12 years). So, when I came out of surgery only to discover that the endometriosis was back (just over a year and half later) and with a vengeance (it caused my intestine to be "glued" to my uterus), I was devastated. I once again, took my eyes off Jesus and put them back on my circumstance. I spiraled downward quickly, questioning my faith and feeling hopeless, helpless & depressed. For a peek into my exact feelings at that time, see this previous post.
Luckily, I don't stay "down" for very long anymore, which is a testimony of my faith, in and of itself. I, once again, cried out to God, asking for direction, not accepting that there is no cure & only surgery, as an answer. He very gently reminded me, "Focus on the things that you can control, so I can focus on the things you can't." and "I provided everything to physically nourish you - tea, spices, fruits, vegetables, etc. It's all here, in nature. When man starts messing with stuff and tries to create things better, it causes problems. Just like the story of Adam & Eve. The humans were deceived into thinking they knew better than me. Stick with me and my creations and you'll be fine." I immediately started researching naturopathic medicine. I discovered a woman from Europe who, much like me, decided to take her diagnosis & treatment plan into her own hands. She sought healing through nutrition as well as other naturopathic means and claims be "rid" of her endometriosis. I immediately thought, "This is something I can control!" and my hope was instantly restored.
So, currently I am seeking out naturopathic doctors & taking my health into my own hands by following the endometriosis diet. The diet is intense & will require a major life change. So, I've decided to take one concept from the diet and introduce it into my life each week, until the entire diet is apart of my new life plan. I'm so excited! Follow me in my journey to my new healthy self. And thank you, Lord, for never abandoning me & for giving us resources & direction to sustain the crappy things that this world throws at us.
